The Acronym Game – An Experimental Book Promo

I was driving home from work, it was a long drive, when I got stuck behind a lorry for about half an hour. I decided I would use this time to try and work out what the acronym on the back of it meant: DFDS

Gross Food Challenge

I have a YouTube channel. Well, my daughter (Kassidy) and I have a YouTube channel. For the past two years we’ve been writing a kids book together called Tommy, God of the Island of Wonder, which we finally completed a few weeks ago. It’s a comedy about a boy called Tommy who, having just blown…

It’s FREE! The Accidental Scoundrel is FREE!!

The Accidental Scoundrel is free right now. If you don’t already have it, get it. Kindle e-reader, kindle app on your phone, go to Amazon, download it for free. Read it. Laugh. Go back to Amazon and tell the fucking world how brilliant it is. Do it now. Go on. It’s free. What else are…

The Incredible* News of Large Scale Chicken Cloning

I was on the phone to my brother, David. “How are there enough chickens?” says David, quite unexpectedly following immediately after a deep and difficult conversation about a psychopath’s attempt to kill him by un-bolting the suspension on his truck (but that’s a story for another day). “What do you mean?” I say, looking at…

I Think Super Mario is a Leprechaun

I’ve just seen the trailer for the new Mario game that’s coming out on the Switch. I thought Mario was a human!? Mario Odyssey is based in the real world, instead of the Mushroom Kingdom, and so there are normal people milling around the city (New Donk City…) and Mario, by comparison, is clearly not…

When Kids Ruled the World

I had a terrible realisation recently. I think I might be 11. And there’s a good chance you are too.  Let me explain. I remember my dad when he was in his thirties, as I am now. And I remember, very distinctly, that he was a proper grown up. He knew what he was doing….

The Obscene and Criminal Malice Inflicted by Time

You know when you lose your TV remote and it drives you crazy. You look everywhere. You search frantically, chucking the pillows off the couch and lifting it up to look underneath. You check under newspapers and lift up the rug. How can it have disappeared? It’s a TV remote! After looking everywhere you finally…

The Vainglorious Abyss

The Hipsters are here. There’s no stopping them. They are throw backs to beat poets who hate them. The copycat brethren of false intelligence. Hoodlums dressed like nerdy impersonate.   They stroll the poor towns they decorate with old art. 50s pin ups and 60s haircuts, they are the false smart. “I am a canvas,”…

Did a Ghost just fly out of this Trumpet?

(Video of ghost at bottom of post) I don’t believe in ghosts. Let’s start with that. I have recently moved into the house my mother grew up in. 5 generations of my family have lived in this house over the years. We haven’t always owned the house, and there was a gap of about 40…

Comedy: the runt of the genre litter

I think there should be a movement in literature. Humour needs recognition. Movies, television, theatre, music, they all have a legitimate genre section. So why not literature? I went to my local branch of Waterstones to find something to tickle my funny bone. It’s not easy. Where is The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy? In…